Pleasure is my business, my life, my joy, my purpose.

Tag: EdenFantasys

EdenFantasys: A Sex Shop I Don’t Trust

It’s taken me a while to get to posting about all the problems that have been going on with EF. I mentioned briefly when I stopped reviewing for them after all the crap that happened in 2008 but have never dedicated a post to it until now. I wasn’t going to, until I tweeted about EF and had people ask me what was going on, which made me realize there probably are people out there who haven’t heard about what is going on and would like to know. I think getting this information out there is important.

I would like to say, I don’t have any negative feelings about people who work for EF or who are continuing to review for/contribute to EF as long as you are making informed decisions. My problem is with the upper management of the company, the policy makers, and thus the corporate entity itself. I’m not advocating for anything with this post other than your right to make informed decisions. Reviews for EF will still be included in Pleasurists, just like they have been from the beginning, even though I have chosen not to work with them since 2008. I am actively encouraging you to read up as much about everything going on and make your own decision, even if that is contrary to my own.

What follows is a list of links regarding the controversy surrounding EF and my own opinions at the bottom.

Wilhelmina Wang has put together an awesome link round-up of the epic fail which is so awesome and amazing I am blatantly going to steal from it (and by steal I mean repost with permission). My own personal reactions are after the links (look for the line).

EdenFantasys History of Fail(s)

2008

– Sexblog giant Always Aroused Girl works on blogging & PR projects for EF, but is refused payment for her work, and so sues her employer and dukes it out in court, with little success.

– Another sexblog giant, Essin’ Em, works on developing a reviewer program and bringing in new products to the site. Her employer gives her a hard time when she leaves an IM conversation with him to take care of a friend who was just beaten up by her husband, then berates her for not mentioning EF in an interview she gave which had nothing to do with the company, and doesn’t pay her her affiliate commissions in a timely manner.

– EF agrees to sponsor the 2009 NYC Sexblog Calender, then backs out at the last minute.

– The Google Spreadsheet that contains reviewers’ confidential information (full name, physical address, along with their blog name and URL) is made public due to an ex-employee’s fuck up. EF claims that using Google Spreadsheets is not how they typically run their business, which Essin’ Em points out to be a blatant lie.

2010

That Toy Chick blogs about how she was also forced to legally fight for pay that was her right.

Epiphora, one of the most prolific sextoy bloggers out there, is banned from EF’s forums for no apparent reason. EF says that she was banned for “drama, rudeness and overall negativity”, but it appears that she was banned merely for stating her honest opinion. She was banned without being contacted about it first, without any of her posts being flagged, and EF goes on to publicly humiliate her in their forums under the guise of “being transparent.” One contributor decides to leave EF for good over this issue, and a whole bunch of posts are written in Epiphora’s support:

~ Essin’ Em: EdenFantasys, Not a Place I Trust

~ AAG: Problems with EdenFantasys, Take Nine Thousand

~ Garnet: A Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing

~ Sarah Sloane, who used to be on the editorial staff of EF’s SexIs magazine: Money, ethics and real sex-positivity

~ Britni: Bad Move, EdenFantasys

~ Carnivalesq: EdenFallacys

~ The Blogging Slave: EdenFantasys.com Debacle

~ Toys in Love: When Push comes to Shove…

~ Woman’s Tribune: Eden Fantasys, A Sex Shop No One Can Trust

~ Erosblog: Edenfantasys.com Shoots Itself in the Balls… Again

– Maymay, who runs Maybe Maimed, Kink on Tap and Male Submission Art, and who also happens to be a professional computer programmer, discovers that EF’s linking practices are unethical. (This post has been cross-posted here, here, here, here and here, and Maymay is encouraging people to re-post the entire entry, or excerpts of it, in case he gets a Cease and Desist notice.) Basically, EF pretends to link back to its reviewers, contributors, people who they’ve done link-exchanges with, even companies whose products they sell… but they actually don’t. The links don’t work. This prevents others from getting traffic from all of EF’s sites, and ensures that EF will appear higher in Google search results. Google specifically points out that behavior like this is unethical. In his post, Maymay also outlines actions you can take in response to this. You can report EF to Google here.

Internet sex toy retailer Web Merchants, Inc., which bills itself as the “sex shop you can trust” and does business under the name EdenFantasys, has implemented technology on their websites that actively interferes with contributors’ content, intercepts outgoing links, and alters republished content so that links in the original work are redirected to themselves. Using techniques widely acknowledged as unethical by Internet professionals and that are arguably in violation of major search engines’ policies, EdenFantasys’s publishing platform has effectively outsourced the task of “link farming” (a questionable Search Engine Marketing [SEM] technique) to sites with which they have “an ongoing relationship,” such as AlterNet.org, other large news hubs, and individual bloggers’ blogs.

Articles published on EdenFantasys websites, such as the “community” website SexIs Magazine, contain HTML crafted to look like links, but aren’t. When visited by a typical human user, a program written in JavaScript and included as part of the web pages is automatically downloaded and intercepts clicks on these “link-like” elements, fetching their intended destination from the server and redirecting users there. Due to the careful and deliberate implementation, the browser’s status bar is made to appear as though the link is legitimate, and that a destination is provided as expected.

For non-human visitors, including automated search engine indexing programs such as Googlebot, the “link” remains non-functional, making the article a search engine’s dead-end or “orphan” page whose only functional links are those whose destination is EdenFantasys’s own web presence. This makes EdenFantasys’ website(s) a self-referential black hole that provides no reciprocity for contributors who author content, nor for any website ostensibly “linked” to from article content. At the same time, EdenFantasys editors actively solicit inbound links from individuals and organizations through “link exchanges” and incentive programs such as “awards” and “free” sex toys, as well as syndicating SexIs Magazine content such that the content is programmatically altered in order to create multiple (real) inbound links to EdenFantasys’s websites after republication on their partner’s media channels.

A similar slew of posts crop up in response:

~ Garnet: Business Ethics

~ She Posts: EdenFantasys Accused of Hoarding Links

~ Rayne: We’re Just Waiting, Hoping… Giving the Benefit of the Doubt

~ Sarah Sloane: Beyond Disgusted… Partly with Myself

~ Tom Allen: Beast of Eden

~ Figleaf: Web Merchants, Inc and EdenFantasys Unfortunate, Unethical, Link-Hiding Policies

~ Menstrual Poetry: EdenFantasys: Crumbling Community

– Britni posts to EF’s forums, linking to Maymay’s entry. The post is removed in less than a day. So much for EF being transparent! Luckily, both Britni and AAG took screencaps of the forum thread.

EF posts a response to Maymay’s entry, which basically reads: bullshit, bullshit, placating-PR-speak, more bullshit. They claim that they’re using linking practices that many other big websites use, in order to prevent viral links. Hmm.

– Maymay explains why, exactly, their explanation is bullshit. (Cross-posted here.) (More information can be found here.)

– When EF forum members start questioning EF’s practices, voicing their concern, or, in some instances, doing nothing at all, EF responds by locking their accounts and deleting threads and posts, even though they claim to support freedom of speech and claim to not censor their membership. Again, with no warning or contacting of the members who posted the comments in question.

~ Juliettia: EdenFallacys

~ Britni: EF Continues to Dig its Own Grave

~ Woman Tribune: EdenFantasys: A Sex Shop No One Can Trust

~ DarlingDove: What I Tried to Say On EF

~ Forum Discussion Screenshot via Mistress Kay uploaded by AAG

~ Forum Discussion Screenshot via Of Sex and Law uploaded by AAG

– EF explains that they are disabling these accounts and posts as a “cooling off period.” They go on to add a FAQ thread, where they elaborate more on the locked accounts, as well as their linking practices, claiming that “there has never been an intention, or agreement, or any commitment to link back to a writer,” “there is nothing illegal or even suspicious in our business practices” and “if you read negative posts about us, look a few lines below or to the side, you will always find our competition’s promos,” none of which makes any sense.

– Sex educator and writer Violet Blue comments that EF may be looking at a reputation crisis, and says she will be writing more about the scandal shortly. Tristan Taormino re-tweets about the debacle, and sex toy stores such as myticklespot begin commenting on it, as well.

– In spite of it all, a number of people are deciding to stay with EF because of other factors.

There’s a good amount of discussion, re-tweeting, etc going on on Twitter under the hashtags #EFLies, #EdensFallacy and #EdensFucked.

Epiphora has put together a (much more well-written) post about these events, with more past-employee-horror-stories, here.

To summarize: the biggest issue some people are taking with EF is that they claim to want to foster a community, but their actions indicate that they could care less.

All the info above (after “EdenFantasys History of Fail(s)”) is from Wilhelmina’s awesome post!


My Opinions

When I first started reviewing sex toys I reviewed for EF. I stopped in 2008 when they screwed AAG over, when Essin’ Em posted about her experience with EF, and when the owner made some an extremely backhanded comments basically saying “we don’t need the sex blogging community so you should praise us for letting you in to our club.”

I get that EF is doing reviewers a favor in supplying toys to review, in trying to build a community, etc. But that doesn’t mean they should say one thing and then do another. While, yes, I highly appreciate any site that is willing to send me (or anyone) free products in exchange for a review, that doesn’t mean I should not hold them accountable for unethical practices. I do appreciate the fact that EF seems to want to build up the sex blogger community and sponsors sex toy reviews, (notice I said “seems”) but that doesn’t mean they should snub their noses at us, the reviewers, contributors, and bloggers, because if they didn’t really need us you wouldn’t see dozens of sex toy related websites looking for people to write reviews for them to drive traffic to their sites and up their pagerank.

I found Garnet Joyce’s post on “A Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing” to be extremely spot-on as far as my feelings for EF, especially in her comparison of EF to SuicideGirls. Essentially they are trying to use sex-positivity as a marketing tactic rather than an actual philosophy they agree with. I highly encourage you to read it, especially if you know the controversy related to SG (and if you don’t, then you should definitely read it).

For the full list of things EF has done see above. The biggest thing recently (not counting the massive crap in 2008) is MayMay’s, discovery of their incredibly unethical linking practices. As it mentions above, EF responded to these claims extremely poorly, silencing anyone who dared speak against them by locking or banning them from EF.

MayMay tweeted about a TED Talk on How Social Media Can Make History by Clay Shirky which is extremely relevant to the situation, if you don’t want to watch the entire thing (it’s about 16 minutes long) I suggest you skip to 12:26 where he talks about the Obama campaign. Basically, instead of shutting down a controversial and negative group on MyBarackObama or simply ignoring the concerns being raised Obama issued a press release saying “I hear you, I understand your complaints, but I am still going to vote the other way.” While people were upset that he did not change his mind they ultimately respected this because Obama actually addressed the issue they were talking about and clearly showing that they were heard.

Clay Shirky says (I’m paraphrasing) the mature use of social media is to realize your job (as an administrator) is not to control the content of your supporters/contributors/etc. but to convene them together so they can talk amongst themselves. EF does not understand this.

Something @JulianArancia  said at Sex 2.0 keeps coming back to me, especially in relation to EF: “In the PR world it’s always the cover-up that kills you”. There’s even an EdenFallacys.com now because of all the shit they have been pulling. If they had apologized and stopped their unethical linking once it was brought to their attention? It probably wouldn’t have been as big of a deal. Still a problem, but they would have addressed the concerns in a better way. If EF let us know that they were listening to our concerns and actually addressed them without lies, that would be a whole other issue.

Now, I’ve been on the wrong end of things before, said things that was taken wrongly and offended people. I get how defensive that makes you, I get how hurt you feel when people start attacking you, I get it. However, companies have PR people trained to deal with this kind of stuff, or at very least can hire one when they need one. There is no excuse for a company to react defensively or make backhanded comments, there is especially no excuse for trying to cover up their unethical behavior.

I also get that EF is a business, that they can do whatever they like in terms of that, but that doesn’t give them license to go against Google Webmaster Guidelines and do something completely unethical (and then say they aren’t in violation of GWG). It also doesn’t give them license to not pay people who have worked for them like they did with AAG.

(Also, as a sidenote regarding linking practices, I’ve heard people mention that WordPress (WP) automatically sets “nofollow” to links and saying that is just as bad or the same as EF’s javascript redirects. This is not the case. WP does set “nofollow” to comment links (ONLY comment links) to try and discourage spam. This is not the same as using sneaky javascript redirects that look like real links but aren’t. Setting links “nofollow” is acceptable to GWG, javascript cloaking links is not. It’s not like every link on a WP site is set “nofollow,” but if you are worried about it there is a plugin called DoFollow which corrects this.)

EF has proven time and time again that they do not do what they say, they change their policies at a moment’s notice once it doesn’t line up with the way they actually are running the business. They use the guise of transparency to be rude and negative and then turn around and cover up an issue without actually addressing the fact that what they are doing is highly unethical. They do not have the best interests of their contributors, employees, or customers at heart they are just in it for the money. While this is an understandable business policy what I am opposed to is the fact that they promote themselves as community-oriented, woman-friendly, and sex-positive while clearly using these terms as a business tactic and not an actual philosophy.

Sex Toys and Videotape

Note: there’s nothing really in here about videotape, I was just amused by myself at the title. I know, it’s kind of lame, but I’m often easily amused and also having a big can’t-think-of-a-better-title moment. That is all.

You may have noticed there have been a lot more reviews around here lately, or just a lot more things to do with sex toys in general. In part this started when I started Pleasurists, my weekly adult product round-up, but really it started before that when I started reviewing for Vibe Review, and right before them Eden Fantasys (though those were EF-on-site reviews not blog-based reviews, I was contacted by EF later about writing blog-based reviews for them). My love of sex toys was rekindled, I hadn’t really bought many in the few years prior, but I already had quite a few.

I love reviewing toys, I’ve come to realize, and I love being around toys and teaching others about them. I love helping others connect with their sexuality in general, but specifically sex toys are something I’ve been connected with for many years now. I’ve come to think that is what I will want to do with my life in some way or another. I mentioned this briefly before but I’ve been thinking about it ever since then.

I’m not sure if it would be a better idea to open my own store and site or to just try to work for one of the ones I love so much that are already established. I think it would depend on if I could get a job with one, as I know competition is rather high! It seems that a lot of getting a job with toy companies is who you know, so here’s to this blog helping me with that.

I’ve recently joined a few new reviewer programs, as you may have noticed from the new links and banners within them, Babeland and SexToy.Com as well as Vibrator.Com which I don’t have a review up for yet, but one will go up this Friday. You may be asking yourself: how many review programs does one femme need? To which my greedy reply would be, of course: as many as possible. However, there have been some other developments than just gaining programs.

I was recently suspended from Vibe Review‘s program because no one has bought toys from them through my affiliate link, even though I get quite a few hits on it, just no sales. I can understand this position since, after all, it is a business first and foremost and not just meant to give me toys, but I’m definitely disappointed because I really enjoyed working with VibeReview and would love to continue working with them.

I can continue reviewing once some purchases have been made through my affiliate link, so I’m asking you all, if you have a toy that you’re planning on buying from VibeReview, please click through my affiliate link with VibeReview before purchasing the product with them so that you may read more reviews on here from them and generally help me out! If you don’t know what product to get feel free to email me or comment with some ideas about what you are looking for and I can suggest one, or look through my past reviews for some ideas of what you might want to buy.

Also: the affiliate proceeds from any toys you buy through my affiliate link will be donated x2 to The Butterfly Temptress Cancer Fund, so in addition to helping me out by clicking through my affiliate link you would also end up basically donating part of your sex toy purchase to help her out as well!

Also, speaking of The Butterfly Temptress Cancer Fund, Babeland is allowing affiliates to donate their December affiliate proceeds as well, and so all of my affiliate proceeds from any toys you by in December through my Babeland affiliate link will go to The Butterfly Temptress and her battle with stage four cervical cancer. I’m rather poor at the moment, but I’d rather the money go to her so that she has a better chance of recovering!

Then there’s this mess with EdenFantasys which I’m really not sure how I feel about yet. I’m sure I’ll post about it once I have sorted everything out.

Review: Luna Pleasure Bead System by LELO

By now I’m sure you won’t be surprised when I mention just how much I love LELO, because everything I’ve reviewed of theirs thus far I have raved about, and the Luna Beads are just as well crafted and gorgeous as any of the other toys I have reviewed, yet completely different. Lelo makes amazingly high quality toys for men and women (they recently added a cock ring and butt plug to not leave men out from the Lelo fun!), and while each one is different, the Luna Beads are perhaps the most unlike their other toys.

The reason why they’re so different is because they are not meant for use during sex and aren’t meant to get you off, unlike the rest of the Lelo line. The Luna Beads are Kegel exercisers, meant to strengthen the muscles of the pelvic floor and, essentially, make one’s vaginal opening tighter (vaginal opening is such a sexy word, I know, but that’s what it is!). Similar products are Ben Wa Balls, Smart Balls, and all sorts of Kegel wands.

The Luna Beads are an especially exceptional set of Kegel exerciser balls because they don’t just come with one weight of balls, but two. The pink balls weigh 28 grams and the blue balls weigh 37 grams, so you can have anywhere from 28 to 74 grams of weight at any given time, which means these will last you a longer time than most Kegel exerciser balls because you can vary the weight to your progress. In addition to the beads you also get a silicone “girdle” (another sexy word, right?) which you can put the beads into so they are attached to each other and easy to get out and keep in.

According to the manual (because all LELO toys come with a manual) in addition to increasing the tightness of the vagina doing daily Kegels also helps to restrain and prevent stress incontinence; provides a sense of “being in command” of the nether regions, boosting sexual confidence and sensual well being; and enhances erotic sensation and directly taps the source of ultra-intense orgasms. Now who wouldn’t want that? Even if you think you’re plenty tight there are other reasons to do some Kegels.

The manual also says that the best way to use the Luna Beads is daily and while you walk, run, swim, or move about especially. The motion of movment creates the inner balls to move which creates a subtle vibe that stimulates the muscles. Since it’s best to use them daily while moving I incorporated them into my regular gym-going routine, so I would put them in prior to going to the gym and take them out afterwards, getting a good amount of kegel workout while working out the rest of my body.

I found that in just a short amount of time I was able to notice the difference, able to keep both beads in longer instead of having one slip out almost automatically. Onyx mentioned he could tell a difference as well, that I felt tighter around him. I also find that if I’m having a particularly unsexy-feeling day or my libido is down and I wear my Luna Beads for a while my sexual desire returns quickly, which is also a plus.

Like all LELO toys, the Luna Beads also come with a one-year warranty, satin storage case, and black storage box. They are made of body-safe and non-porous PC-ABS with a silicone “girdle” (no silicone lube!). My greatest rating of a toy has to do with how often I use it, and I use the Luna Beads just about every day, and since I’m still on the pink beads I’m sure I have quite a while until I graduate to using two blue beads, and so I will be using them for quite a while longer.

If you are interested in kegel exercisors, or simply libido enhancers I’d highly recommend getting your own set of Luna Beads to use every day or just once in a while.

Sex toys - EdenFantasys adult toys store

Review: Ella by LELO

If this already hasn’t become apparent to you, then you probably have not read my other reviews of Lelo products because I rave about them every time I have the honor of reviewing one. This time it is no different. Although the first time I tried out the Ella I actually didn’t enjoy it, but that was because I was in a strange sexual headspace and not really enjoying anything at the time. It was obviously all in my head because the second and all further times playing with Ella I was in love.

Like all Lelo toys she comes in a gorgeous black box with a satin pouch, manual, and (one year) warranty information. Although unlike Iris and Nea (and most other Lelo toys) Ella is a dildo, so there’s nothing to plug in or charge up, Ella is ready to go immediately. She is made 100% out of silicone, is extremely sleek and classy, and comes in either black or white from EdenFantasys (I got the black).

Ella is currently the only dildo in the Lelo line, and is a double-ended dildo to boot. Her two ends look a bit like the Gigi and the Liv put end-to-end. I’m a bit of a size queen, though I appreciate small toys as well if they are well made, and Ella is a little smaller around than I thought she would be. She is only just over one inch in diameter (1 1/4″), but regardless I found them to be absolutely fantastic for g-spot stimulation, especially the end that is curved with the flat head (Gigi-like).

I tried Ella a few different ways: thrusting inside of me, working inside of me, and with a vibe on my clit. Of course (clit whore as I am) I got off with a vibe on my clit, I used both the Hitachi and Nea and enjoyed each combination. The femme accessorizer in me enjoyed having the black Ella and black Nea working together (though I would have loved a black Lily instead, because the finish matches the Ella better than the Nea’s finish, but that’s just my OCD talking). Thrusting with both ends was highly pleasurable and Ella seemed larger when she was inside of me, I’m not sure why. Working it inside of me was pleasurable as well (by “working” I mean very slight thrusting, basically). Both ends make a wonderful handle for the other so the toy is extremely easy to maneuver.

Like all Lelo toys Ella was just absolutely fantastic, and looks more like a work of art than a dildo (“pleasure object” as Lelo calls all of their items). It is sleek, fem(me)inine, elegant, and gorgeous. I am constantly amazed with the pleasure objects Lelo produces and I can’t wait to get my hands on more of their toys! I’m especially lusting over their newest toy Bo, which I just discovered today, though I could list all of the toys that I don’t have as ones that I want.

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Review: G-Plus Massager Attachment

My second verified review for Eden Fantasys went up this morning, on the G-Plus Massager Attachment.

This massager attachment fits on spring-ball type massagers such as the Hitachi or Ideal and is shaped much like the Rock Chick, G-Rock or other vibrators which hit both the g-spot and clitoris. It is made of TPR (Thermo Plastic Rubber) which while it is phthalate-free, it is also porous and since this toy would be difficult to be used with a condom, it should not be shared.

The TPR material does add to the toy, however, it makes it very bendable. This can make it difficult to insert without lube, but with lube it makes it wonderful for moving the little 2″ nub onto the clitoris while the 4″ insertable length works inside.

Master and I had a wonderful time playing with this toy and using it on me until the sheet beneath me was covered in sweat! I can’t stress enough how much I love the Hitachi, or how much I think this attachment makes the Hitachi that much better. Read the complete review on EdenFantasys here!

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Review: Colt Shower Shot

My very first verified review! How exciting!

My review of the Colt Shower Shot Anal Kit/Enema Device is now up on Eden Fantasys as of today!

Despite my long-time love of anal, this was actually my first enema experience. I thought that the toy itself was very reliable, the only downside is that it is jelly rubber, but since it is not used vigorously and used with water, and should it be cleaned well/completely it should be relatively safe. Also, due to the way it is set up, with holes all along the 4 1/2 inches of insertable length it gets deep inside and was able to clean me out nicely.

Aside from that, the entire experience was wonderful. I was a little intimidated by it at first, but I enjoyed the sensations of it as well as the cleanlyness which I felt afterward. Though, I did discover a tear which discourages me and Master from playing further with my ass for a few weeks, before it has chance to heal. Which is really too bad, because that is why I bought the toy: to add to my daily preparation routine. I also want to get a lube injector and some lube to go along with it, so I would be fresh and ready for anything he desired to do once he got home from work.

Read my full review and don’t forget to vote on if the review is useful or not (I appreciate it). Look on the sidebar over to the right for more links to my other reviews.

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Review: Bondage Duckie

My review of the Bondage I Rub My Duckie sex toy went up on EdenFantasys a few days ago!

The Bondage Duckie is adorable, I originally bought it as a display-only toy since I thought it was too cute not to have, but soon learned that it was well worth using as a toy as well! Read all about it here! And, of course, also visit my reviewer profile, and don’t forget to rate my reviews, please!

Also, I applied to be an advanced toy reviewer after submitting it and I was accepted! My first toy to review has already been approved, and is going to be the Colt Shower Shot which is an enema device, so look for that within the next two weeks! I’ll post a link here once it’s up, of course.

I also have a few toys still to review, just ones which I own already and would like to submit reviews of. Look for updates once I submit each of those as well!

Sex toys - EdenFantasys adult toys store

Review: Waterproof Wabbit Vibe

I just submitted my review of the Waterproof Wabbit Vibe on Eden Fantasys.

This is a vibe I’ve had for years and which I love dearly. While it’s no Rabbit Pearl (featured on Sex and the City and the most well-known rabbit vibrator) the only major difference is the lack of pearls and spinning of the internal shaft.

The Wabbit, however, can be taken into the bath, and for those who prefer clitoral stimulation (such as me) it still has the wonderful bunny ears which have been known to get me off multiple times (read: 60+) in a day. Read my review here and check out my reviewer profile.

Sex toys - EdenFantasys adult toys store

Review: Remote Controlled Butterfly

Just published my first review on Eden Fantasys! It’s on the Remote Controlled Butterfly which I absolutely adore.

I’ve had the toy for a while, but didn’t get to really try it out until Master and I went on our trip. I talked about it in this post (the remote to it was passed around, if you remember that?) and it was wonderful.

Read my review! My reviewer profile is up as well!

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