Purveyor of Pleasure

Pleasure is my business, my life, my joy, my purpose.

Tag: events (Page 1 of 2)

In the Year 2010

someecards.com - Let's resolve to repeat last year's mistakes

At the end of 2008 and 2009 I made posts exactly like this one, a “best of” post, if you will. Basically a highlight of the important things that happened in the year previous, which will be followed by a post of the things I hope to happen in the year to come.

While I didn’t achieve all the goals I set for 20101 I did achieve quite a few of them. I didn’t get either of the licenses I mentioned last year, both of which I would still like to get, actually, but I did find a partner (albeit an ex at the time), write more, comment more, figure out my job situation, work on getting out of debt (not there yet), and I was definitely more active. Pretty good, if you ask me. So here are some of the highlights of the year.

In 2010 (kind-of sort-of in chronological order)…

More? Of course there’s more. That short bullet-point list doesn’t account for everything I did in 2010, but it’s definitely a start. I didn’t mention my sex toy review site Wanton Lotus Reviews or my sex toy review round-up project Pleasurists which celebrated 100 issues. I didn’t talk about all the times that Onyx and I had sex or exchanged words of love. My posts for this past year haven’t even captured everything I have written about, this year was more about going out and doing.

I’m excited for the next year to come. I think it will be amazing.

  1. I do not like to call these resolutions but rather goals, expectations, and hopes for the next year. Resolutions have too many connotations associated with them. []

Ebb and Flow

Just like everything else the needs of poly people can change quite often. Since Onyx and I got back together and I returned to Seattle we have had quite a few casual play experiences but neither of us have really been interested in another new relationship. I think at least partially this is because we were both so burned by the last one, but mostly because of the change in our dynamic and activities.

We’ve both gotten considerably more involved in the local occult community than we ever really have been before while we’ve been together. Our D/s-slash-O/p relationship is also far more solid and working. Also we both are working a lot and I’ve been taking a certification class recently. Add all this up together and it means we have just about enough time for each other, let alone someone else.

This is one of the drawbacks of being poly: even with a desire for another relationship there is a point when it comes down to how much time you feasibly have for a new relationship. Now, all of this isn’t to say that either of us would be against a new relationship should something develop organically (the only way we would want it to anyway), but neither of us is actively looking for another partner.

That being said I do still feel the pang of desire for being with a woman. I need a woman in my life with which to have an intimate relationship, that is just a fundamental truth at this point. I’m confident, however, that I will find someone when the time is right. There are just too many things that I am working on and that Onyx and I are working on together so there isn’t much room for anything else. I am very much still poly, as is Onyx, but that doesn’t mean we’re out there actively looking for new relationships.

This isn’t abnormal for poly people, in fact while in the midst of writing this post I came upon the term polysaturated1 which describes what I’m feeling quite perfectly, except I only currently have one partner but many many activities.

This all said, not looking for a relationship also does not exclude the possibility of casual and play partners, in my opinion. Something with friendship and emotions but without being “serious” would be ideal for me at this point in time. I would love the opportunity for purposefully casual play with friends as we’ve already explored a little.

This desire has definitely encouraged me to get looking around more at the local kink community, which I am already making plans to get more into. Not just to find causal play partners but to friend friends first and foremost. While there is definitely bleed over between the occult and the kinky scenes here in Seattle it’s also not a ready topic to be broached with a new acquaintance at occult social events.

Anyone who is already friends with me on FetLife may have noticed that I’ve been on there more lately and I’ve especially been looking at events in my area and tirelessly ticking “going to” or “might be going to” when I find one that interests me. Onyx has been doing much the same. We already signed up for a Delving Into Power workshop with Lee Harrington in February which we’re both very much looking toward. Plus the weekend intensive class I’m taking is over next weekend so we will have more opportunity to go to events than we have in the last two months.

I’ve been slowly pulling our focus toward kink as well as everything else that we’re doing, as I’m sure you may have noticed if you’ve been reading this blog at all the last couple months. Whether or not this happened because of starting the 30 Days of Kink or I started the 30 Days of Kink because my focus was already shifting to kink-related areas is a definite chicken and egg scenario. Regardless, it’s happening.

I’m really looking forward to getting into the community here, and I’m sure I will share as that journey moves along. Perhaps the ebb and flow of poly needs and desires will change once again through this exploration.

  1. via Gabe on FetLife []

Looking Forward

Onyx and I are making lots of plans for this coming year, places and events we are going to go to and people we want to see. Lucky for us there are many awesome events right here in Seattle this year that we are going to, and one in our former home of Salt Lake City. Once I get a job and start making money we may be able to afford other events (there are plenty I would love to go to, kink conferences especially), but for the moment we are sticking to mostly local events.

We are also extremely excited about Amber (of Divergent Dance) and Em (of Life in Transition) heading up our way in April. Onyx got to meet them in November (I think, maybe December?) while I was in Juneau which I was highly jealous about, and now it’s my turn! I’m sure I’ll be writing about the experience.

(Edit)
I also forgot at the time of posting this that Nadia West is coming our way in April. Lucky for us all she happens to be coming the same weekend that Kyle and Roxy are also planning on visiting the Emerald City and seeing us! The wonderful CoyPink lives nearby as well and I haven’t seen her since I left to Juneau, so the six of us are planning on going out. It should be an absolute blast!
(/Edit)

Some of these events are small workshops and such, some of them are bigger conferences. I will probably be writing about all if not most of them, so here’s a taste of what might be coming up post-wise. You can find information about each of the events by clicking on their titles (they’re all linked), or checking out the FetLife event page for each of them. I was going to write a little blurb about each of them, but I figure if you’re interested you can click the link!

I’m also interested to know if anyone of you are planning on attending any of these events, if so comment or drop me an email! (lotus AT scarletstsyr.com)

BDSM and Anal Play
March 27
CSPC (Seattle)
FetLife Event

Making Open Relationships Work
March 28
Babeland (Seattle)
FetLife Event

Seattle Erotic Arts Festival (SEAF)
April 30 – May 2
Seattle
FetLife Event

Sex 2.0
May 22 – 23
Seattle
FetLife Event

Element 11
June 10 – 14
Salt Lake City
FetLife Group

Servant’s Retreat I
June 25 – 27
Kenmore, WA
FetLife Event

Peg-ass-us by Pack of Others

I’ve known John Leo for the better part of the last decade (eight years? More? Less?) though it’s been a good five or so years since I’ve seen him. We’ve been in touch recently via Facebook and I am super excited at the chance to see him and meet his partner Sophie and see them perform! They are going on tour with their show Peg-Ass-Us, a musical romantic comedy about pegging looking at “queer sex for straight folks.” How fantastic is that?!

They’re coming up here to Juneau and also to Seattle and Portland, so if you’re in either of those wonderful cities (and I know some of you are) you definitely need to check them out. They’re also based out of Brooklyn, and have performed in major cities all over, so even if you’re not in Seattle or Portland you should get them on your radar and see if you can see them next time they’re in your town!

There is more information on their website.

They’re also on Facebook, Twitter, and have their show listed as an event on FetLife for the Seattle show and the Portland show so you can get all social networky with them especially if you are able to go or even if you’re not!

The show information:

John Leo and Sophie Nimmannit, a real-life couple, have crafted perhaps the silliest, most heartfelt romantic comedy about strap-on anal sex ever. Their beginner’s guide to “pegging” (as coined by Savage Love readers) – complete with sing-a-longs, how-to’s, puppets and soul-baring striptease – offers a hilariously penetrating look at queer sex for straight folks. But as the lesson probes deeper, it devolves into a lover’s quarrel that tickles qualms, exposes scruples, liberates desire and comes to a climax where everyone gets off.

After a month-long run as Artists-in-Residence at Dixon Place in New York City, Pack of Others takes their sex-ed kink comedy Peg-ass-us on the road, spending February 2010 – “Creative Romance Month” and “Safer Sex Awareness Month” – on tour in the Pacific Northwest. Join us!

“a real audience pleaser; it’s frank, illuminating and theatrical, no matter how you like your bacon”
–“Stage Notes” by Tom Murrin, PAPERMAG

“Sex-Ed at its Best!”
-Drs. Carol Queen & Robert Lawrence
(featured educators, Bend Over Boyfriend video series)

“This little theatrical workshop on sex, relationships and intimacy was informative, amusing, clever, touching and sexy all in an hour.”
~Ty Stover, Indy.com

Tour Dates

Feb. 5th-6th – Juneau, Alaska
The Hangar (in the Wharf) Ballroom
Egan Drive, Merchants Wharf
Shows at 9pm
(includes Special Performances of Juneau’s
Off the Hook Honeys (Burlesque),
Snaptastic! (Buffoon) in “Your B*tch is Next”
and more!)

Feb. 14th (Valentine’s!)- 17th – Seattle, WA
Annex Theater
11th Ave at E. Pike St
Seattle, WA 98122
Shows at 8pm
Tickets $15 (general admission), $10 (students/seniors)
(Monday 15th, Pay What You Can)
Advance tickets: www.annextheatre.org

Feb. 19th-21st – Portland, OR
Someday Lounge
125 Northwest 5th Avenue
Portland, OR 97209
Shows at 8pm
Tickets $10 advance, $12 at the door
Advance tickets: www.somedaylounge.com

In case you need more convincing, here’s their youtube video too!

In the Year 2009

I refuse to reminisce about the past decade unless it's in a

The ever-so-popular year-in-review post, much like my In the Year 2008 last year. So, this is a little late, but I’m still posting it anyway! The new year is always a good time to reflect on the year before and look forward to the year to come, so here’s my reflecting.

In 2009…

Were there any other significant events in my life in 2009? Definitely, though that doesn’t mean I remember them all. Was there anything that I mentioned on here that you think should be included in this list and isn’t? Do you have a favorite post of mine in 2009? What were your significant moments of 2009?

And, since someecards has sort of gotten me on the subject… in the last decade…

  • I lived in Juneau, Alaska; Ashland, Oregon; Salt Lake City, Utah; and Seattle, Washington. I then came full-circle back to Juneau.
  • I graduated college, receiving a double Bachelor’s of Science in Psychology and Gender Studies from the University of Utah.
  • I had lots of sex, some of it good, some of it bad. I learned a lot about sex in general.
  • I met Onyx in the middle of it (five years ago, it was December/November time I believe, so just over five years).
  • I grew into myself. My clothing style is much the same as it was in 2000 and I’m back in my hometown, but lots of other things are drastically different. I am still shy and social-avoidant, but I am more confident and self-assured.
  • I cut my hair shorter than chin-length for the first time, and dyed it for the first time both in general and an unnatural color.
  • I had at least four blogs (more if you count livejournal or diaryland) and a short-lived sex podcast under another pseudonym, this is the longest-running one of the bunch I believe.

Might add more as I think of them.

Sex 2.0 Conference – I'm Coming!

sex20

I’m so very excited! All the stars have aligned to send me to my very first sex-oriented conference Sex 2.0 which is all about “the intersection of social media, feminism, and sexuality.” I had enough mileage for a plane ticket to New York City where I will be staying with one of my sisters (both of whom live there).

Now I’m sure you’re going “wait, the image above says it’s in D.C. not NYC, what’s going on here?” or you’re not, but I’m going to address that question anyway: it was just way easier to get a flight to NYC than one to D.C. plus it means my trip can be longer than just a couple days so that I can hang out in NYC!

I’m flying over on the red-eye May 5th and arrive in NYC Wednesday May 6th around 7am. Then I have time in NYC until Friday at 10:30 when I’m bussing over with the amazing Mollena, the fabulous Essin’ Em and whoever else makes it onto the Friday NYC to D.C. sexbus! It’s going to be a blast!

Then, the conference, I’ll be staying in a hotel room with Domina Doll who I absolutely love and am very excited to be meeting for the first time! I’m meeting pretty much everyone going for the first time since this is my first conference, so I’m super excited. There will be lots of fun to be had on the 9th (Saturday) but also the night before, Saturday night, and Sunday morning. I’ll be tweeting while at the conference, no doubt, and posting about it once I return as well (or maybe on the bus back as it does have wifi), so look forward to that!

Once the conference stuff slows down I’ll be heading back to NYC on Sunday night to stay with my sister again, then I hope to make my way up to see my lovey Kat (also Kat of Kat and glen who Onyx and I went to England with last May) and Carnivalesq who live not too far away from each other. I’m not sure how or exactly when I’m going to do this yet, but I want to. I fly back home to Seattle on Wednesday.

It’ll be the first time that Onyx and I have really been apart since well before we moved, so it will be interesting in that respect as well. I’m going to have a lot to do so I’ll probably be able to stay busy enough to not think about it too much, but I’m sure we’ll miss each other terribly.

Who else is coming at to Sex 2.0? Any of you in NYC and want to meet up for coffee/drinks/whatnot while I’m there?

More About Sex 2.0

From the website:
Sex 2.0 will focus on the intersection of social media, feminism, and sexuality. How is social media enabling people to learn, grow, and connect sexually? How is sexual expression tied to social activism? Does the concept of transparency online offer new opportunities or present new roadblocks — or both? These questions, and many more, will be addressed within a safe, welcoming, sex-positive space.

You can still get a ticket at the discounted rate of $30 until April 16th, then it goes up to $40. They also may have some scholarships available for those poor folks like me.

For more information:
Sex 2.0 website
Google Group

The Sex 2.0 Google Group is where all the discussion and organizing of the event (and the events before and after) is happening.

For a great compilation of links regarding last year’s Sex 2.0 check out this post on Viviane’s Sex Carnival

Whirlwind

If you follow me on twitter you already know this, but, I have officially moved to Seattle.

The last couple weeks have been crazyinsane trying to get everything together for moving and such. It’s been wonderful, but busy busy busy. Exciting but stressful. But more than worth it.

The apartment we have is about four blocks from Babeland Seattle, which was accidental but wonderful! We are going to an event there on the 31st, a rope bondage class taught by Midori! I’m pretty excited about it.

We got here Saturday afternoon, after driving most of the day Friday and the morning of Saturday. We had food, unpacked, and then said goodbye to our neighbormates who drove with us up here. We wanted them to stay the night, but they wanted to get over the pass before nightfall. We’re comforted by the fact that they will come back, and then we’ll know where to take them.

We’ve mostly been exploring our new neighborhood for the last couple days, getting acquainted and used to the area. We are basically right in the middle of everything! Right in between downtown and capitol hill, a very perfect location.

There are so many other things to say, but I need to get some sleep so I can wake up early to watch Obama’s inauguration!!!

Yes We Did

Just 75 days and some odd hours until the current administration and the last eight years become a memory, and Barack Obama becomes the 44th President of the United States. I am overwhelmed.

I’m saddened that Proposition 8 does not seem to be doing too well in California. While not all of the results are in yet there is quite a gap. The good news is we know that they’ll end up doing something else in CA to legalize same sex marriages at some point in the near-to-distant future, another loophole to jump through, etc.

I’ve heard a few people who opposed Prop 8 say that they think it wasn’t right for the courts to overrule something the people had put in place, to which I replied that is the job of the courts and our leaders to look out for the minority that the majority is oppressing. If they weren’t looking out for the minority we would probably not have as many civil rights . The most extreme and obvious examples are slavery and segregation. If we had let the people decide those may never have ended (and probably wouldn’t have).

On a lighter note, from my election party tonight (for those of you who didn’t already see them on twitter):

Obama cupcakes (from scratch, yes, I made them myself including the icing. It was all vegan and sugar-free, though you wouldn’t know it if I didn’t tell you).

Red, white, and blue martini – Mango or Pomegranate Vodka (we had both, it called for cranberry but the only cranberry vodka at the liquor store was smirnoff), blue curacao, and red pop rocks on the rim of the glass (like fireworks!). The vodka and curacao were layered, the vodka on top of the curacao, though it’s kinda hard to tell in the photo.

Vote!

For those of you in the United States, the 4th is a huge day for us, not only because we are going to get the change we need (I hope), but also it may be the largest voter turnout in history they say, assuming people will actually wait in lines as long as they’re going to be. Lucky for me, I vote absentee in Alaska, so I have no lines to wait through.

Be sure you know where you’re voting and who and what you’re voting for.

If you’re in California: No on Prop. 8, please!
If you’re in San Fran: Yes on Prop K

If you’re in the USA:

I hear Starbucks is giving away a free coffee to anyone who votes, Baskin Robbins is giving away free ice cream to those who vote, and the wonderful Babeland is giving away Maverick sleeves and silver bullets.

Personally, Onyx and I are throwing an election day party at our house, complete with red, white, and blue martinis called Boston Pops Martini (heavy on the blue), I’m highly considering making Obama cupcakes tomorrow as well (vegan, most likely), and I also bought champagne for the event hoping that the outcome is good!

In addition to the national presidential election, the other two I’ll be watching closely are the two mentioned above, though there are many other ballot measures in other states that are just as important. See Sinclair’s list over here.

What are you doing for election day?

Flesh is the Law

Just because I feel like sharing, and I’m still hyped up from the show…

In honor of the band we went to see tonight, The Genitorturers, I present to you one of my two favorite songs of theirs (the one they didn’t play at the concert–the other favorite is Sin City). After the concert we got a poster (which I put up right when we got home) and their newest DVD. ALSO, Gen (the lead singer) signed and kissed my boob! It was fabulous! The entire show was wonderful, and it was great to meet some new people and see others in a different setting than we’re used to.

Without further ado…

And, since I’m proud of it, here’s the signature she left on my boob, she kissed right below it too, it was hot! It kind of makes me want to get it tattooed, not because I’m really into her/them per se, but because it looks awesome and it’s the first time I’ve had my boob signed before! (It’s kind of like getting a second HNT pic this week)

Tomorrow we shall return you to our regularly scheduled postings.

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